"Do Not Throw the Lube at Her."

I still get emails from time to time asking me why I started writing this blog.

There are numerous reasons, but one of them being (which I've stated before) is that when I went through the breakup; I wanted to create something to show others in my situation the progress of going through it.

I was surprised when I got a phone call tonight that would actually put my experience through the test.

Mama So: So?
So@24: Hi mom.
Mama So: Can you give your brother a call?
So@24: What's wrong?
Mama So: I think something happened between him and Celene [his long term girlfriend].
So@24: Yeah?
Mama So: Well, you've been through this! You can talk to him!
So@24: Thanks, Mom! Alright, I'll call him.

When I got my little brother on the phone, he was huffing and puffing. I've never heard him so livid in all my life. That's including the time I peed on his Castle Grey Skull playset.

So@24: You okay?
Lil' Bro: No man. I'm not. I'm so fucking pissed.
So@24: What happened?
Lil' Bro: She broke up with me yesterday. And then she FUCKED some dude that SAME NIGHT. God. I can't believe this. How could she do this??
So@24: I know, man. I know. Well... what are you going to do now?
Lil' Bro: You know what I'm going to do?? You know what I'm going to do??
So@24: Uh oh...
Lil' Bro: I am meeting up with her to confront her about this. And you know what I'm going to do? I have a fucking tube of strawberry lube and 4 condoms in my hand. I am going to throw them in her fucking face and say, "I hope you have fun!"

My brother was angry. Very angry. And he was being dead serious; he was going to throw this bottle of strawberry lube and four contraceptives at his ex girlfriend.

It took everything in me not to bust up laughing. I composed myself and said the only thing that came to mind.

So@24: Um. Do. not. throw. the lube. at her.
Lil' Bro: No, man. I'm doing it.
So@24: Wait-- why do you have strawberry lube?
Lil' Bro: Because I use it!
So@24: Alright, alright back to the topic at hand. You need to calm down. You don't want to do something you're going to regret later.
Lil' Bro: How did you do it? How did you do it??

Now Lynn didn't sleep with someone while we were dating. But she did date someone right afterward and then flew him back to our hometown for Christmas break all within a month. So, I could relate to my little brother to a certain degree. I know what it's like to fume with white anger, to feel completely helpless, and betrayed.

I told him my story, not as a means to compare who should be more hurt... but as a means to let him know that "Hey. Someone close to you has been there before."

I told him what kept me from not going completely ape shit. What made me keep my cool and think of the bigger picture.

So@24: How did I get through it? Well, you first have to ask yourself... do you never want to speak with her again? Is that what you really want?
Lil' Bro: ... no.
So@24: Well, don't you think that throwing a tube of sexual lubricant at her face might burn that bridge? This shit will pass, trust me.
Lil' Bro: If you saw it, you'd think it was funny.
So@24: Not gonna lie, that would be fucking hilarious. But I know you and I know that Celene means a lot to you despite all this shit. Go meet up with her, get your questions answered, but leave the lube at home.
Lil' Bro: Alright.
So@24: And the condoms.
Lil' Bro: Okay, okay.
So@24: Okay.
Lil' Bro: Thanks for talking to me. I actually do feel a little better.
So@24: Where is the lube and the condoms?
Lil' Bro: They are back in the drawer.
So@24: Good man.