Tuesday, April 8, 2008

The Battle Plan of Wing(wo)men

I've noticed that during my short time as a single, mid-twenties male that a few trends are consistent across different people and different situations.

I learned a new rule based off two conversations I had over the weekend.

Every girl claims she is the best wingman.

Now, I certainly don't have any personal case studies to confirm or refute this statement (yet anyway). But almost every girl has some amazing glory story proving their wingman abilities. And I must say, I was very impressed. I wonder how many guys actually tap into this resource.

I love getting point of views from the opposite sex and I'd like to share with you two strategies I learned over the weekend.

Girl Strategy 1: Buying Her a Drink

The first conversation I had was with my friend C. And although she's just giving me a scenerio, her insight looks like it can translate well to a real life situation. I was explaining to her that simply asking a girl, "Can I buy you a drink?" seems absolutely transparent and cheesedick. I argued that girls don't like it when guys buy them drinks. She offered this:

C: I'm going to give you a convo.
C: Ordinary, unassuming girl sits at a bar with two decent friends. Girls are having a friendly convo, not too intense, leaving room to be approached. Eyes are watching the room around them, no one is crying. It isn't a "newly single celebration" scenario. You want to avoid those.

Enter So@24.

So@24 is at the bar to get drinks. He sees Ordinary, Unassuming girl and friends. OAG looks at him as he approaches bar, tries to get bartenders attention. So@24 sees OAG look. Smiles. Laughs and says to the girl, "You can never get their attention when you really need to"

OAG smiles, "True"

So@24 smiles, goes back to waiting for bartender. Looks over at OAG. OAG is still smiling, now slyly pointing out his presence to friends. So@24 looks at OAGs drink, interested
"What are you drinking?"
OAG: Vodka soda.
So@24: Ahhh... solid drink. Do you have a favorite shot? I need to buy a birthday shot for my coworker and I can never tell what girls like to do shots of.
OAG: I'm a whiskey girl myself, but Washington Apples are good or Fernet.
So@24: Great choice! Want to do one with me? I'm So@24 by the way...

C: See? And you're IN! Easy. Not creepy.

It's easy, approachable. Not invasive, not overwhelming. You can bail if she's not responsive or engage if she is.

So@24: Actually... that doesn't sound too bad, C.
C: I know I'm right.


Girl Strategy 2: Settle an Argument w/ Disney Characters

Another one of my friends was boasting about her amazing wingman technique that has never failed for her.

She told me that her guy friend will point out a girl that he's interested in at the bar. She then makes her way over and starts with:

So my friend and I are having an argument and we're trying to get another opinion. I say that [insert Disney princess' name] is the hottest Disney character, but he's saying that [insert another Disney princess' name] is. What do you think?

She says this has worked to at least establish opening up an easy line of communication between her friend and the girl he's interested in talking to. It seems pretty fucking brilliant to me.



By the way... the hottest one is Belle. Damn, girl's got it going on.

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